Light


You what the best thing in life is? It is when you wake up in the morning and decided to walk over the shadow.. the best feeling on it is, you started to realize that you can’t stay in the shadow for too long. Yea, probably it’s too late but nothing is ever to late.

That day, I was suddenly get happier than before. Realizing that world is so much more to explore. Realizing that during the journey, I have met wonderful people that I almost ignore all this time. It was a sudden realization. and I can’t thank enough to God Almighty for that wonderful experiences and journey.

Now I understand why He answers my prayers a year ago, which is just to make me learn that things that I wanted so bad is actually bring harm into my life. So He teaches me with a very brutal and cruel way, so i can be ready for any on coming event. Alhamdulillah.. I see the light He gave. and I can never thank enough.

so life is free and easy now. I almost finish my masters (perhaps next year), I’m tutoring at two unis in town (which i love), and i open up my heart again for almost anything. Life is so good on me now. I do what I love with people who loved me endlessly.. So it is true that God actually never take anything away from you, because He always replace it with something much precious and thousand times better.

To you, you and you…the people who bring me up during the darkest period of my life. Thankiu for always be there. I’ve been surrounding by a matured and good friends everyday which make things easier to handle. You guys are my saviour.

Truthfully,

Chibby.

Bad day


I don’t know why, but today, my world is turning upside down.

First started when i got stuck doing my research analysis. i felt something is really wrong since last week. And all of sudden, i found that, i haven’t complete the interview to the citizen just yet. and furthermore, i need to change my research question and objective. And can u ever imagine, changing these two things in research will force you to read more and more and extra 20 pages of literature review 😦

 

plus earlier, i’ve got really upset when my dell’s Pc broke down. I have been with her for 3 years and a half. and she’s been really kind to me, in terms of editing etc. but now, she’s dying. because of the hard disk need to be repair and change whatever it says. I am really upset about this. I can’t even remember that lotsa work was inside the PC. and Running man  toooo :((

 

after that chaos, i have a lil bit issue with somebody which i don’t wanna even think about it. I was just devastated.

 

then i went back college to make some dinner. but because i’m still sad about my PC, i forgot that mother stock me ‘Ayam telur’- It is the kind of chicken that is chewy-  and i tend to make a fried chicken. and i don’t know why, i put soy sauce to the chicken, and also chili powder before i put it into the frying pan. and it got a lil burn and well, THE CHEWY CHICKEN WASN’T NICE TO EAT ALL ALL.

 

sigh. i am pretty sure that today, is my very very bad day 😦

 

 

Happy Story

It has been a very long time, dear Bloggie. and yet, so many things happened for the past previous month and most of them makes my heart jumping around. To you, thankiu for coming back. and makes me happy every day and night. And i hope this time we really work our things out. 🙂


It has been a very long time, dear Bloggie. and yet, so many things happened for the past previous month and most of them makes my heart jumping around.

To you, thankiu for coming back. and makes me happy every day and night. And i hope this time we really work our things out. 🙂

How to educate your kids to respect other people.

How do your parents educates your behaviour? My dad always the strict one, in terms of being respect to people. I think that is why i’ve being so cautious and careful about what i’m gonna say. But well as a human, we can’t be too much confident of our self is perfect than the others bcz ppl … Continue reading “How to educate your kids to respect other people.”


How do your parents educates your behaviour?

My dad always the strict one, in terms of being respect to people. I think that is why i’ve being so cautious and careful about what i’m gonna say. But well as a human, we can’t be too much confident of our self is perfect than the others bcz ppl might not agree at all. FYI, i’m quite harsh with words only to some ppl i think i need to be harsh. But i just wanted to shared this with.. whoever reading this.

How did my father raised me up?

I’m not ashamed saying My childhood basically in Felda quarters environment. I think this is probably the best childhood experience in my life. Kalau nak cerita sampai esok pun tak habis. But i enjoyed every single living in Felda Quaters. Father works as The manager so.. we kinda moved to lotsa diff places. But since I was a kid, there is few parameters that my dad treat us. and i really hope this can be my own parameters to teach my kids as kids nowadays is horrible !

Start with a simple thing. How To be Respectful to the others.

1. During prayers, none of us (siblings) were allowed to keep watching TV (He will automatically switch it off) , to be inside our room or do whatever we do. He will called us to the living room and we will together listen to the prayers.

2. As the youngest, i stay at home as all of my bros+ sis went for Sekolah Asrama. So, everyday, I need to mengaji with my father. this had been practiced Muqaddam since i was 5 years old. I started to follow them praying when i was 6 and  practiced on my own when i was seven. Yeah it’s kinda late.

3. My mom always nagg. and i think most ppl knows how much I hate getting that nagged (esp by mom, well sapa suka?). But, everytime she nagging me around (happened since i was 9) of course kekadang ada jugak melawan. Father said i was the only person who like to Lawan semula. But father never get mad at me.

4. When Angah and Alang done something serious (back in school) and Father were really upset about it. Father beat them after he asked mom to brought me and stay in the bedroom. But i can clearly listen to Alang and Angah cries loudly at the living room. I was thinking They must had done something really serious. because father is not the kind of that person who likes to beat.

5. I once failed to do calculation as i got 30% in the test. this is when i was in standard three. Dad throw away my maths book away right in front of my eyes. but He didn’t say a word.

6. Father always take me to town, eat KFC only once a month, just if i get good result in school.

7. He send me to school in the morning and wait for me at the gate when i finished school.

why is my Father do is important? this is the reason. (in conjunction with number 1-7)

1. To respect other, we need to train our kids to respect the ALMIGHTY. that is why sampai sekarang, just if ada orang solat dalam bilik, I NEVER SLOW DOWN THE VOLUME OF THE SPEAKER, BUT MUTE TERUS. i still think it is so NOT respectful if you sedang solat, there is still a noise inside your room. come on, tak mati pun mute suara. I think lack of people aware of how important this is. Nak jumpe and bercakap dgn Tuhan, tapi tak focus. So i’ll thanks Father so much that I kept this behaviour to respect people who tried to have peace meeting the Almighty.

2. Need to train the kids about Islam and agama since they were baby. I think new parents nowadays lack of this sense. it’s too late to train your baby when he/she was able to have friends around. Too many destruction occur. dulu tak sama macam sekarang. sekarang ada technology.

3. Bila Mom yg marah, father usually tak masuk campur. I think this is good. Because during that time, takde kes back backup anak sbb last2 anak jadi manja. Kalau salah dengan orang tu, sila tanggung sendiri.

4. Masa dengar Alang and angah kene pukul, i was literally sad. I hear every single thing, why Father was so upset about my siblings behaviour at school. Both of them were at the bording school, Father at that time was holding a huge position at Felda. one thing i will never forget sampai sekarang is this;.

Abah turun naik ladang setiap hari dari 7 pagi sampai 6 petang, nak cari duit sampai korang masuk sekolah asrama, jadi orang pandai. Ini yang korang bagi kat Abah?

5. Kids nowadays may think that it was an abuse if their parents throw away their book and as solution = lari rumah, lepak hisap rokok dengan kawan. When father threw my maths books, i noticed he NEVER said , ‘apeke bodoh sangat kau ni.’. father will just be quite. lain dgn ibu bapa sekarang panggil anak itu ini. I think because of this kids always not doing their best in studies. Its Father who started to respect me, at the first place.

6. You’ll pay your kids only after they done something to be proud of. Bukan senang-senang my dad nak bagi pape even masa i dean list every sem time diploma pun, Grad dengan jayanya pun.  Ye my father mampu bagi semua tu, but  If i want something I need to earn this myself and appreciate.

7. sending and picking your kids from school is IMPORTANT. keep them save, and control hwo are they might be with. This is the only way to show, and to ask, how do they do at school. what is their story. My father using motorbike fething me from school from kindergarten to  standard 4. and he always asked what is the most interesting part of my school today. This kinda communication u know.

this is only a few of i remember. I believe that if i asked Alang and Angah to add up, they probably had a lot of stories to share. Well, the successive of didikan kepada anak can only be seen with the kids achievement. By only looking at Along, Angah and Alang, i knew, that father, had bring out a good things, treat us and teach us very very very well!

and setiap hari as we all going well, father is growing old.

bersangka baik dan mengawal marah


 

Sepanjang 23 tahun dan beberapa hari aku hidup dimuka bumi ini, ada dua perkara yang aku tidak akan cuba lupa dlm setiap perkara yang dilakukan..

  1. Bersangka baik dengan orang.
  2. Apabila marah, mausia cenderung akan melupakan secebis kebaikan yang pernah dilakukan kepada kita. maka pendekkan rasa marah.

Perkara 1, mmg sangat susah nak praktis. Aku mmg seorang yang kuat suspicious. Masa sekolah, mmg drama queen habis. tapi masa sekolahlah masa yang aku tahu, siapa yang sebenarnya berada dibelakang kita masa kita susah, masa kita popular, masa kita diambang kejatuhan. Tak ramai pun. dan masa inilah aku mula start rasa menyampah dengan ramai sgt org yang aku rasa Fake.

tapi bila umur makin meningkat, kita sendiri rasa penat. Penat nak drama queen lagi, penat nak amek pusing hal orang, penat nak rasa susah hati kenapa orang ni layan kita camni, penat nak jaga hati orang pun ya. and masa amek degreelah lebih macam-macam muka timbul. Actually, bende mudah is, tak yah la heran kenapa orang tu tetiba baik ngan orang tu, kenapa tetiba berdiam diri, kenapa keluar tak ajak orang tu orang tu. bende mudah is, tak perlu khuatir siapa tinggal sapa, siapa kawan baik ngn sapa, sapa menyampah ngn sapa, it’s all life. mungkin kene tinggal ngn member atas sebab sikap sendiri? sebab mungkin sebenarnya chemistry tu tak ada langsung, tetapi bertahan disebabkan sudah lama bersama? mungkin sebab member tu sendiri ada alasan berbeza yang sebenarnya tak perlu nk amek pusing pun ..

Mungkin sebenarnya semua tu masalah berpunca dari diri kita, tapi yang buat aku muhasabah ialah, aku tahu siapa dengan aku bila aku nangis nangis thesis kene reject dengan Dr Nazri, sapa yang bagi semangat, sapa yang tak reti bagi nasihat sewajarnya dan sapa yang betul2 tolong aku. Aku ingat dan tak akan lupa.

tetapi dlm byk2 perkara bila kita rasa diri dah tua, dah tak kuasa nak amek pusing. maka, hanya perlu bersangka baik, kurangkan rasa suspicious apa orang rasa pasal diri sendiri, janji buat kerja bagus, perform dengan baik, tidak sombong, orang tanya dengan baik, kita  layan baik. itu sahaja yang penting. sebb aku percaya mcm ni sebenarnya kita lebih happy seadaanya. Tak rugi tak fikir pasal orang, serius!

perkara 2, nampak mudah, tapi seriesly yang paling susah. Rasa marah ialah rasa yang paling susah untuk tak buat. Kadang2 bende kecil pun jadi isu padahal takde apepun. Mungkin sebab nada suara yg kedengaran tak selesa maka dengan murah meng-interprete rasa marah individu. maka melihat org marah, automatik jadi marah juga. Ala, aku pun macam ni. Rasa marah tu sellau ada, tetapi bagaimana kita kawal melalui suara. Bagi aku masa marah, berdiam diri lebih baik. Malah Rasulullah pun ketika marah, hanya diketahui muka Baginda merah menahan marah. ternyata tidak sukar mengawal marah.

dan apabila marah seseorang, memang secalit kebaikkan dia pada kita, (sebagai contoh mungkin tolong kita amek celotape ke, bagi hulur gunting ke kan) automatic kita lupa. Aku nak praktik ni bertahun tahun lamanya. Memang bukan senang, tak senang langsung. tapi tidak mustahil. Contoh, bile orang menyindir kita, dalam hati kita mesti akan ckp ‘ala kau ckp org, kau pun sama..’. aku memang  pantang sikit org scrastic . Tapi aku selalu fikir, aku pun dulu mulut memang celupar.. so ni lah kot akibat terlalu celupar, orang celupar balik kat aku. So aku diam jelah. tp dlm diam itulah sendiri terasa kemenangan sbb tak menjawab. tapi seriesly kepada sesapa yang sacrastic kan, or berjenis sacrastic, sebelum ckp pape, berfikirlah sebelum ckp pape sbb diri sendiri pun mungkin bukan contoh terbaik pada orang. Aku selalu ingat arwah Pak Amir selalu cakap, sebelum jawab soalan dia, fikir dulu. Die tak suka orang main jawab je soalan dia tanpa fikir. We’re dealing with people so it is supposed be not easy. So jangan buat orang marah kalau diri sendiri tak mahu marah marah tak tentu pasal.  dan apabila sedang marah, diamkan aje diri, sebab dengan menenangkan hati sendiri sebenarnya dapat elak perlbagai perkara yang boleh lead to something more dangerous. 🙂 sabar itu kunci segala-galanya (kata nad nordin)

yeah, not an easy things to do tetapi, umur dah tua..hidup tak panjang. buatlah perkara yang boleh memberi menfaat kepada orang lain. Kejar duit, kejar nama, kejar popularity, kejar cinta tak akn  kemana, jika bukan pada Allah tempat kita mengadu domba.

 

p/s : entri ini tidak merujuk kepada sesiapa kecuali diri si penulis dan juga pengalaman lepas yang menyebabkan dia menjadi agak berhati-hati.

 

 

:(


 

dear my best friend.. My soul mate, who i believe knew me very very well..

sorry for not texting or calling u, as i have no excuse for not being able to spend time with you.  I’m not looking for excused or pape, but trust me, it has nothing to do with what i’ve wrote in this previous post bcz it is not about you at all. I don’t dare writing something not good about my bestfriend here, it just not rite.

and I’m always will feel guilty if I hurt you. in any type of things I do. whether it is in small of huge things. It is all matters to me.

even the thing that is simple for you, it’s a big things on me..

 

I am sorry. truly I am.